


Behind The Sea

by squipsong



Category: Girl Meets World
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Bisexuality, Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV) References, Drugs, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, F/M, Farkle Minkus-centric, Lesbian Maya Hart, Lovers to Friends, M/M, Minor Maya Hart/Riley Matthews, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pansexual Riley Matthews, Sexuality Crisis, Tags May Change, be more chill references, kind of out of character smackle im sorry, oc is non binary!!, probably references to young justice, well not everyone but, yes i mentioned wally from young justice
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-09-12 06:10:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16867591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squipsong/pseuds/squipsong
Summary: and boy, did they have fun, behind the seafarkle deals with life.





	1. Flowers

**Author's Note:**

> cass, i know youre reading this because i sent you the link (if i havent forgotten) and here it is uwu and thank you for your help with stuff sjdjsjdj also the chapter titles are songs that may have to do with the chapter,,,,,,, maybe not
> 
> also mentions of anxiety at the beginning, be safe! also,,, idk how american schools work just go with this please

farkle wasn't like he was in middle school. he didn't wear his turtlenecks anymore (but that began with billy and then with the yearbook thing, when he turned into donnie barne: the regular guy) and he dated smackle. they were kind of enemies in seventh grade, but they actually turned out to have feelings for each other. well, they thought they had. farkle was just so confused lately.

he didn't know what to think when he was around smackle, because when she looked at him, he didn't feel something like at the start of their relationship, but he didn't want to break up with her, because he didn't want to be all alone again. even though the triangle was resolved when maya came out and then got together with riley.

farkle was so happy for them, but he still felt like something wasn't right. something about himself, even. the thought of it made his head spin and barely nothing could do that. normally, farkle would go to riley's for advice, but she and maya have been in their own bubble lately and he didn't want to bother them with his problems. he could go to lucas and zay, but nowadays they were so deep into their team sport (farkle always forgot what sport it was again) and isa? he couldn't talk to her about how confused he was about their relationship and that he maybe wants to break up with her? that's probably what he should do, but then he would need hours to figure out what he wants to say and then his heart would start beating so bad and he couldn't breathe and farkle didn't want that to happen. so, he was just gonna ignore his feelings and do everything he's supposed to do.

since the triangle was resolved, they could finally have a normal history lesson again. that reminded him, they also had a test in another subject tomorrow, he should've studied for it by now, but farkle had a lot on his mind, since his parents decided to break up at the end of summer break. he still hasn't talked to his friends about it (except smackle, but who could keep anything from her) but why would he? riley and maya would care too much and so would zay and lucas. they would ask him constantly if he's "okay". what even was "okay" for him by now?

the next day, farkle wished it wouldn't be monday, or any kind of day at all. he just wishes he could stay at home all day and sleep. the brown haired boy didn't get any of the sleep he wanted at all. his parents still lived together, so them fighting would be inevitable. they didn't care their son had school the next day, no, they had to fight about something so irrelevant, farkle already forgot what it was. the boy still had to get up, so he did and got ready for school.

when it was time for history, farkle felt just so, so tired. he just hoped mr. matthews wouldn't notice, but he always does. before his teacher came in (much to farkle's luck) somebody else sat down behind him.

"uh, hi? i-i'm dylan and i'm new here" the guy said and smiled. "oh, and don't let me forget to tell you to please use they, them pronouns."

"hey. i'm farkle and this is history with mr. matthews, as you probably already know and don't be confused if his lessons get" farkle paused "personal. his daughter is in this class and it's been like this in history since i can remember."

"okay, i guess i can deal with that? also, this is my first day here and i don't know anyone so could you maybe, uh, maybe show me around?" they asked.

"yes, of course. how about lunch? you can eat while i show you around if that's okay." farkle answered them.

they both smiled at each other, dylan answered with a nod and shortly after that, riley and maya came in, followed by mr. matthews.

after the bell rung to show history was over, farkle waited outside the room for dylan.

"so, ready to see abigail adams?" farkle asked and smiled.

"of course. show me the way!"

farkle just led the way and showed dylan all the things he needed to know. they talked about random stuff and had fun, but what farkle completely forgot was he was supposed to eat lunch with his friends and girlfriend. he noticed that when isadora came over to him and dylan and said that she needed to talk to her boyfriend for a moment.

so they went to the lockers and farkle asked "what did you want to talk about?" "i just noticed you didn't come to sit with us at lunch. i was a little worried." smackle said and made farkle feel guilty.

"sorry, isa. i was just showing dylan around, because he's new here. i just forgot we were supposed to meet up for lunch." he answered and smackle shrugged it off. "that's okay. you were just helping him, but please don't abandon me again? at least send a text next time."

"yeah, yeah, i will."

a few days later, when their group (+dylan, they kind of just included them in the group, which was nice) was sitting at lunch, maya began to say: "hey, farkley, i just wanted to knooooww if youuuu would drive meeeee and riley to this party we've been invited to by some cheerleader chick!"

"maya, dear," farkle started to say "didn't you forget i don't have my driver's license?"

"ugh, shit. what aboouuut you, dilly? i know for a fact ranger rick wouldn't drive me. he hates parties." maya whined and had the puppy look in her eyes.

"so do i," riley said lovingly to maya "but you drag me every time." "you love me, babe." "oh yes, i do."

"not to interrupt your lovey-doveyness," dylan now said "but i can drive you, only if farkle can come with me. i don't want to stand there all night, alone, and wait for you." "and why do  ** _i_** have to come with you?"

"because, lucas hates parties and zay has been talking about vanessa the whole time!"

"ugh, fine, but only because i know what it's like to be forced to hear about how 'vanessa's hair is so amazing' and 'how good vanessa can kiss.'" farkle said and everybody began to laugh, except for zay.


	2. Hurricane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the party™

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also???? if there are any like,, grammatical mistakes or something, i apologize!! also i absolutely dont know ANYTHING about drugs or weed ig thats good though ajsjsjsjd

it was the day of the party and, to be honest, farkle just wanted to call in sick and not go. but maybe he just needed to loosen up, have some fun at that party tonight, he thought. that probably wasn't a good idea, it'd be a really stupid idea, but what could go wrong?

 _a lot_. a lot could go wrong. when dylan came, it was too late to cancel the party. so, farkle just had to go, it was going to be okay. he didn't have to drink.

"woah, your place is  _huge_!" dylan said and looked around the room with which farkle answered with just a nod. it was kinda painful talking about what his parents had achieved together, now breaking it up.

"let's get riley and maya, yeah?" farkle just said with that and went to the front door and dylan followed. they both got in the car and drove over to riley's.

they were at the party and the music was already so loud, it would be very, very possible that the police had to show up. when they were inside, maya and riley already went some place else. that made him think, where did dylan go? he just wanted to park his car, then come back. so where is he? but farkle was put out of his thoughts when somebody put their hands on his shoulders, made him flinch and screamed (the music was so goddamn loud): "farkle minkus! you're here? wouldn't have thought the genius would ever show up to a big, big party like this! what's the occasion?" of course, it was kyle thompson, always the one to get into fights. he wasn't a bad guy, he actually was really smart and always friendly with everyone, but sometimes, he was a bit much.

"got dragged here, k. but, i guess i could have fun, for one night?" farkle answered and he didn't know why he said that. too late anyway, kyle took his hand and went with him to the kitchen.

"you look tense, buddy. everything okay?" he said a few seconds later as he poured farkle a drink, something alcoholic probably, not that he cared anyway right now.

"y-yeah, just, not really, feeling the whole thing yet, y'know?"

"drink?" kyle said, giving the cup to farkle after he nodded. "thanks."

"i just thought about it, farkley. first party, right?" answered with nod. "wanna make it memorable?"

"definitely."

a few minutes later, they were in a different room, with some other people he mostly didn't know. everybody there was drinking or smoking, he was too. it wasn't a bad thing, it's not like farkle was gonna drive home or do anything stupid.

"farkle minkus your name, right?" some drunk person from the bathtub they were all sitting in asked him (what was their name again? alex? jesse? oh, it was jordan!) and he was taken out of his thoughts, once again this night. "take this, 'mkay?" they had a joint in their hand and gave it to him.

his, now almost completely gone, sober side wanted to resist, so maya couldn't make fun of him for losing his "drug virginity" later, but she wasn't here right now, was she?

at this moment, dylan came back from their car and confused, because they couldn't see farkle, but before they could find him, they found maya.

"hey, maya. do you know where farkle went?"

"hm, no, sorry dilly, but i think i saw him with kyle thompson? big asian guy, could crush you little skinny boy, but a real softie. you'll know when you see him!" maya answered while getting her and riley some water to drink.

"thank you, if i don't find him, i'll probably go somewhere else, so text me if you and riley wanna get out of here!" dylan said and maya just gave them a nod and went back to riley.

so, dylan went through this big house, alone, to look for farkle. it took them a while, but they figured out where he was and they definitely didn't want to be in that room, because you could smell the weed ten miles away.

why would farkle be in that room? that's the only place they haven't looked though, but they absolutely  _hated_ the smell of weed, so why would they go in there anyway?

"...and then, my mom asks me if he smoked!" everyone in the bathtub began to laugh. it wasn't even that funny, but they were already all high anyway, so it didn't matter. to everybodys (yes, everybody in the bathroom was surprised) wonder, farkle also was. looking back at it, it probably wasn't the best idea to go with kyle, or go to this party at all.

"wait... gays, i have a question... is it gay to be bi?" may, another bathtub person, he probably wouldn't remember after tomorrow, asked them all and she got some confused looks.

"isn't it bi to be bi?" jordan answered her.

"oh, yeah! i should know!" may laughed. "because i'm fucking bi, bitches. bi bi bi!" and then, everybody, literally, everyone sang along. farkle didn't know why, but even he knew some of the lyrics. "i'm doing this tonight, you're probably gonna start a fight, i know this can't be right, hey, baby come on! i loved you endlessly when you weren't there for me! so now it's time to leave and make it alone, i know that i can't take no more, it ain't no lie, baby bi bi bi!"

"wow, even the newbie knows this song!" "because it slaps!" came from the other side of the bathtub. "that reminds me, aren't you also friends with riley and maya? they're together, amirite?" may asked him and took the joint from jordan.

"hmm, yeah, they are. you all know baseball-lucas, right?" may nodded and so did the other four people (it was a large bathtub, yes, they all fit in there).

"they actually were so oblivious, i've known for YEARS how much they've loved each other, but they needed a triangle with baseball-lucas that happened since middle school to make them realize they like each other. that was a whole fucking ride."

may gasped, so did another guy, wally was his name. kyle laughed.

"gays, my friends, gays." he said.

a few rounds of terrible singing (it went from bye bye bye to africa by toto to my chemical romance) and weed until somebody came in.

"what're you all doing in this... bathtub?" a brunette girl asked, farkle thought she looked a lot like... riley. shit, it was riley.

"hide me!" farkle half shouted, half whispered to wally. but unfortunately, riley heard  _and_ saw him. "farkle?! what are you doing in there, cramped in this bathtub?!" she glared at him. "there's more room if you want?" jordan said and made everybody laugh. riley shook her head. "well, anyways, if you still wanna go home with your  _actual friends_ then we're gonna go in a few minutes."

farkle looked at everybody. "guess i gotta go. see you." they smiled at him.

when he walked out of the room to riley, he found not only riley, but maya and dylan as well.

"what were you thinking?!" maya asked angrily and punched farkle's shoulder. "i don't know what you're talking about. i wasn't thinking anything."

"that's the problem! you just gave in to the peer pressure!" riley now jumped in and farkle looked at her like he didn't understand a thing she said (which, he honestly didn't). "peer pressure? what're you talkin' about? this was my choice!" now riley, maya and dylan looked at him confused.

"let's just get home, please?" dylan asked.

the monday after the party, farkle  _knew_  it was going to be a shitty day. it all started with isadora coming up to him. "farkle, honey. what is going on? riley and maya have told me what happened when you went to the party. they told me you where in there, high? is it true?"

farkle sighed. "why does it matter, isa? it was just a party." smackle scoffed. "just a party? what will you do next with 'your new buddies'? hurt somebody? i'm worried about you!"

"well, you shouldn't be. i don't  _care_ about what happens right now! doesn't matter anyways." he yelled. "honey, what are you-" smackle tried to calm him down, grabbing his wrist but he freed himself from her hand and looked her in the eyes. "i said  _it doesn't matter_!" when he was gone, smackle turned around to see her friends, who saw the whole conversation. maya and riley came up to her and hugged her. meanwhile, farkle was outside, hoping nobody would see him skip, because he and skipping? nobody would have ever thought he would think about skipping a class. today, apparently was the day. just as he was going to leave school grounds, may came up to him.

"farkle?! why are you outside? you're not thinking about skipping, are you?" she asked shocked. "uhhh... i am?" "i'm shaking my head, farkle. shaking. my. head. let's go to topanga's, you  _have_ to tell me what's going on, because i know for a fact you wouldn't skip!" "i think" farkle paused and took her hand "topanga's is a bad idea." as an answer, she said "ugh, hello may! riley's mother owns it, i forgot. let's go somewhere else."


	3. Thank You, Next

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> basically me loving my original characters & farkle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i do not have writers block, my writer just hates the clock
> 
> also im not sure if it is, but just to be safe, trigger warning for anxiety, and just feeling overwhelmed, and fights in relationships. be safe and talk to somebody if there's something wrong!!!

while may and farkle went to another cafe that wasn't topanga's, his friends were in class, worried about him. he and smackle never had a fight before, well, not really. they 'fought' about school stuff before (in the end, smackle was always right, which made farkle feel kind of worthless, but he loved her, so he brushed it off). he didn't know why the party was such a big deal for her.

they got to the cafe and then may just began to talk after ordering a coffee for farkle and tea for herself. "so, why were you skipping exactly? i know, we haven't known each other for that long but," she paused and looked farkle directly in the eyes, "i can feel like there's something wrong."

farkle looked at her and sighed. "i had a fight with my girlfriend. wasn't that big or anything but, sometimes, i just feel... overwhelmed, y'know? like, i can't get out of my bed and it's gotten worse since my parents decided to get divorced. i'm just- i'm so scared of what's going to happen. i'm so scared of every relationship i'll ever have ending like my parents'." he paused and then noticed she was the first person to know about his parents.

"farkle," she put a hand on his shoulder, "just because one relationship ends, doesn't mean every one of yours will fail. i promise you. i also know that you could feel better if you talked to your girlfriend about it?"

"yeah, yeah, i know that, but- i- ugh. i just... can't help it."

"and that's completely okay! but like i said, it doesn't mean yours will fail." may smiled at him. shortly after that their order came. they talked more, laughed and found out they have a lot more in common than they orginally thought, but they were interrupted by farkle's phone. "sorry may. probably just something unimportant." he said, while taking a sip of his coffee. "no, no, it's okay. i have to call my girlfriend anyway, she's definitely a little worried about me, since i didn't tell her where i went. that okay?" she asked. farkle answered her with a nod, so may got up and went outside.

while she called her girlfriend (he definitely met her before, but he couldn't quite remember her name), he got on his phone and saw a message from maya.

_where are you????_

_doesn't matter right now, maya._

_yes it does! why are you skipping?_

farkle put his phone on silent and sighed. he looked at may who was happily talking to her girlfriend. he wished he had something like they had, may always seemed so full of joy and she couldn't care less if someone was being a bitch to her because she was bi. to be honest, may made him question some things. sure, farkle liked isadora, but dylan seemed pretty cool, too. maybe he should just talk to may. or rather isadora? he didn't know, so he just sucked it up and hoped he'd never think about it again.

"farkle?" he heard may say and looked over to her. "jordan's getting out of class a little early, so she thought we could hang out? only if you're free, though." now he remembered. may's girlfriend was jordan.

"wouldn't i just be third-wheeling?" they both laughed a little at that. "well, better than sitting alone and doing homework all night, right?"

"yes! let's go, i hope you'll pay, 'cause i do not have  _any_ money on me!" but before he could answer, she already sprinted out of the cafe. well, guess that meant he payed.

farkle caught up with her shortly after paying and they went to visit jordan. meanwhile, maya sat at lunch, worrying about him, just like smackle did. "he just... didn't text back after that?" lucas asked.

"yeah. i don't know, maybe he just doesn't wanna talk about it with me, it's probably better if smackle would talk to him. i mean, they're together after all and i'd rather talk to my girlfriend, too." maya said, shrugging it off, but riley immediately gasped and talked back. "but you're one of his best friends! he can also talk to you!"

"yeah, i know peaches, but maybe it's a relationship problem. something you, no matter how much you'd try, can't fix." they smiled at each other.

"are you assuming something is wrong with our relationship?" now smackle asked and looked kind of hurt. "no, no, isa, of course not, but maybe farkle just wants to talk to you."

"what about... you just talk to your girlfriend, minkus?" jordan asked, sitting in front of him. "that's what  _your_ girlfriend suggested, but..." farkle started, but was interrupted by jordan.

"no buts, minkus. may is always right. don't try her." "talking about me, huh. but jordan's right. like i said, _talk to her_!"

"i know and i will. eventually." farkle answered and the girls just looked at each other and sighed. "if you won't, i'll-we'll kind of have to force you to. anyway, let's get this party started." directly after may stopped talking, jordan whispered, "thank you, next." now, may and farkle just began laughing.

"what? i had this song, well, this line, i don't know anything else of this song, stuck in my head the  _entire_ day and i couldn't do anything about it!"

"jordan," may took her girlfriend's hand and stopped laughing for a moment, "you're literally the biggest badass i know, when we're out in public, but when it comes to being alone or with our close friends, you just turn into the goofiest dumbass alive."

jordan scoffed. "excuse me. i am a badass one-hundred percent of the time!" farkle grinned. "i've known you for what? not even a month, but i can say that you're in fact, a big, soft goof. i mean, have you seen how you look at may?" now, jordan looked totally flustered and her girlfriend just smiled really widely.

"okay, um, maybe, i do... uh... look at may like she's the sun to my moon but," now farkle was the one interrupting her, while may sat there in awe. "no buts. you love her. she loves you. you support each other. you're one of the two sweetest couples i know, so shush."

both of them smiled at him. "thank you. that means a lot, since we had to go through some stuff to get here. but, back to your problem." farkle groaned. he didn't really want to talk about it, but at the same time, he did. "no complaining! we've seen you with smackle, or does she rather want to be called isadora? anyway, we've seen you two together and you seem more distant. why?"

"i'm, ugh. i can't explain, really. i mean, i still like her, you know? but..." farkle started but stopped. "but...?" jordan looked at him. "we can smoke after you talk, if you want." he sighed. "maybe... i have a crush. on someone else. that isn't isa and i don't know what to do about it." farkle said that last bit fast and may blinked after he stopped.

"you know that's okay, right? it's okay to get anxious about it, but it's still okay. the best way is to talk to her! it might seem hard, but it's the best way. she loves you, she'll understand and so will your friends. if not, i mean, they will, they're good friends, but you know, we're always here for you, too. just like wally, connor, dick, artemis, kyle, like, basically our whole group."

farkle was speechless for a few seconds before sobbing and saying "noice." now it was jordan and may's turn to laugh with him, while he wiped some of his tears (now also laughing tears, apparently) away.

"'noice'? seriously? you turned into a jake peralta at the most sentimental moment today?" jordan laughed.

"yeah, i did. but thank you. seriously." farkle smiled and looked at jordan who sat in front of him and kissed may's cheek. then, she jokingly said "i'm with someone, who's sitting right there, nothing's going to happen."

as an answer, both farkle and jordan yelled "i'm with someone, nothing's going to happen, title of your sex tape!"

may groaned at that, but her girlfriend just told her casually "we're the biggest brooklyn nine nine fans alive, love." she then looked at farkle again, her face growing softer, if that was even possible (like both may and farkle said before, she was a big softie) and she started pouting. "please tell us about your crush?" farkle groaned. "pleeeeaaaasssseeeeee?"

"before i say anything to you, or my crush, i want to talk to isa first. i don't know how, though. i'm not good at.. talking about my feelings and telling her and i'm not into her like that anymore.. i- i can't. i just remember how we got together and i always remember that and..."

when farkle stopped, he immediately felt his friends hugging him. "if you want to, you can talk about what happened that makes you feel so bad about how you got together. no matter what it was, there's nothing wrong with it." jordan said, still hugging him.

so farkle told them. he told them about how they thought he had autism. how his friends promised him to help him understand love, but they didn't know he now questioned exactly that. how awkward it was between smackle and him at first and how scared he was then and now is again. they listened and they tried to understand.

may and jordan talked to farkle about how he could break up with smackle, if he really felt that way, but he said 'no, no, i still wanna be with her. this crush doesn't change that'. but may reminded him how he also told her at the café that they got into a stupid fight and she sometimes made him feel bad about it, but he insisted on it being nothing, just overreaction.

 

jordan and may let it go, just for now, but they didn't want to push farkle further. so they just started watching some movies and, because may hadn't finished it yet, they also watched brooklyn nine nine.

 

"now that i watch it," may started, "i can see how you're an amy," she said to farkle, "and you're a rosa." she said to jordan.

 

"well, rosa and i are both latina and amy and farkle are both really really smart. but he could also be a huge jake."

 

"i thought you were gonna tell me i'm holt. that would've been what i expected." farkle answered. "holt? pfftt, never. you're a dork, so is the captain, yeah, but you're more of an amy-jake kind of dork." "okay, that's valid." suddenly, farkle got a message, so he took his phone out, groaning at the message.

 

_farkle, you haven't answered me the whole day!_

 

_isa's worried about you and so am i!_

 

_i'm sorry, maya, but i was busy._

 

_busy doing what, exactly?_

 

_none of your buisness._

 

"everything okay? you look upset." jordan asked. "yeah, yeah. just a friend being pushy. maybe i actually should head home. my parents wanted one last 'family dinner' before my mom finally moves out after what seemed like ages deciding if or if not. and don't tell me you're sorry, there's nothing to do about it." farkle stood up, grabbing his stuff and hugging both of them again. they said their goodbyes (and farkle a few thank you's, again), before he finally left.

"do you think he has a rush on the new person that's now in his friend group?" jordan asked. "maybe, but it's none of our buisness." may answered and kissed her girlfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i actually dont really like ariana grande and shes problematic!! but its,,, the story of my life??? i was in latin with a friend and for the rest of the day i had "thank u next" stuck in my head


	4. feelings are fatal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a loving family dinner & loving smackle hours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trigger warning! parents fighting and panic attacks
> 
> be safe!!

farkle went home after feeling so, so safe with jordan and may. he probably could've even told them that he maybe had a crush on dylan. he just didn't know how to label himself and if it even was a crush. it could've also been admiration, because dylan lived so openly, just like maya and riley did. but, he didn't want to talk about it until he knew exactly what it was, or what he was feeling.

when farkle got home, the first thing that greeted him was the smell of food. but not the selfmade food, no, it was take out. he actually thought thought his parents would make the effort to do something themselves he immediately went to his room to put his bag away, but was then called to the kitchen by his mom.

"i know you're here, honey, so let's eat together now, okay?" he sighed and yelled an 'okay' back.

this last 'family dinner' was going to be a disaster. "so," his dad started, "how was your day?" farkle wanted to sigh, he just wanted to go to his room and stare at a wall rather than this awkward dinner.

"was okay, i guess. nothing special happened." he instead answered. "hm. okay." after that, they just ate in silence for a while.

but his mom had other plans. "so, i've recently heard that maya and riley got together!" she said, while she looked at him like she wanted to gossip _forever_.

"they've been for months. how couldn't you have known about that?" his dad answered instead.

"well, i'm sorry, stuart! i was busy!" she almost yelled. farkle just looked at his plate while trying not to say anything. it was better not to interrupt them.

"busy doing what, exactly?! sitting on my money while we're still deciding to get divorced or not?!" now they were yelling. fuck, he needed to get out of there.

"excuse me? i was not sitting on  _your fucking money_!" she was close to slamming her hands on the table. his dad was too.

"it felt like it, you, always shopping. farkle can agree with me, right, son?" stuart looked at him, but farkle didn't wanna get involved, so he stayed silent.

"can you answer me? i've told you  _so_ many times to answer me when i've asked you something!"

"i'm sorry, dad. may i go to my room?" farkle needed to get out of there. he felt his chest tightening. this was supposed to be them, one last time sitting together like a normal family. he couldn't hear them fight again, not because of him.

"no. nobody's finished eating. you can go when we're all finished eating and after you've helped with the dishes." jennifer told him. that wasn't the answer he hoped for, but he still had one option to get out of there.

"can i at least go to the bathroom?" farkle kind of sounded annoyed at that point, but he didn't care. stuart sighed. "of course you can."

he pushed his chair out of the way, said a small 'thanks' and went into the direction of the bathroom, but in the end, went out of the apartment door and took a spare key with him. he heard his parents yell for him to get back, but he just needed the air.

farkle thought about calling riley, but she didn't know about his parents' divorce. he could call may, after all. she knew about it, but she surely was with jordan now and he didn't want to bother them again. in the end, instead of calling, he texted her.

_need you and a smoke_

_meet me at topangas in 30?_

farkle didn't expect an answer, but went to topanga's anyway and waited for may to come. but, instead of the person he expected, somebody else came. "m-maya? what are  _you_ doing here?"

"what am  _i_  doing here? well, obviously! you texted me for 'a smoke'." maya raised an eyebrow and looked at him suspiciously.

"i did?" farkle asked and went to check. he really did text maya instead of may. what a dumbass he could be.

"yeah. it's moments like these when i think i'm actually the genius and you're not. anyway, why did you need a smoke?" now she was curious and when maya was curious, she was even more stubborn than usual. "oh, no big reason."

"ah, okay. and why exactly are you avoiding dylan and smackle?" maya stood next to him and put her hand on his shoulder. "why are you interrogating me? i'm not avoiding them."

"look." she sighed. "i know something's wrong and it's okay if you don't tell me, but remember when i was closeted and came out to you? yeah, i don't want that to happen to you."

"what the fuck are you impyling right now? yes, i'm so proud of you for being so open after years, but that does not fucking mean anything at all." he didn't want her to know. he knew she was just trying to help, but that didn't do the trick.

"no, i'm not- farkle i just wanted to know what's going on! smackle's kinda worrying a lot. just- just talk to her, okay?" maya smiled at him, hoping she had changed his mind.

"i will. tomorrow. i just want a big round of sleep now, so, good night, maya. see you." farkle didn't wait for a reply and just went home. well, he still was a bit anxious, because he just stormed out. he better be quiet, like in that ninja show he used to watch as a kid.

he unlocked the door (farkle was really glad he grabbed his key before leaving) and tried to get to his room. quietly. that did not work out as hoped.

"care to explain why you went  _outside_ instead of to the bathroom?" his dad said, surprising him.

"jesus fucking christ, dad. you scared me." farkle just answered. "hey! that's not how you speak to your father!" his mom now jumped in. she got a quiet 'sorry' in return.

"maybe we better talk tomorrow. until then, i hope you have an excuse for your behavior. you have a lot of time on your hands now, because you're grounded. i expect you to go home straight after school. now, go to sleep." stuart sounded very disappointed.

farkle sighed. he didn't want to, but he couldn't talk against his dad. that wouldn't end well, so he just went to his room. before he finally went to sleep, he decided to text smackle.

_Hey, Isa. I wanted to talk to you about something. Tomorrow after class?_

he knew she was probably asleep by now, but he didn't care. he just wanted it to be off his mind. sleeping would've been a much worse problem then it was usually. 

the next morning, farkle was very, very tired. he tried to sleep, but it became far more difficult then he anticipated. he thought about so many scenerios that could happen when he talked to smackle. before going out, his dad reminded him of the 'grounded' rules. 

"remember, you're grounded for two weeks. come straight home after class, no solving problems with riley, no after school activities and no..." "no staying at other people's homes, like maya once did. i get it, but i need to talk to smackle after class, i can't cancel that. please?" stuart sighed. 

"thirty minutes! at most."

"thank you, thank you, thank you! bye, dad."

class was very boring that day and every period couldn't have been stretched longer. farkle was so nervous about his talk with isadora. he was so anxious, he started biting his nails, he rarely ever did that. after their last class, he went to his girlfriend's locker. 

"farkle, honey. you wanted to talk to me? i'm glad you did, we haven't really done anything together for a while!"

"i know, i know, but i've wanted to talk to you about something else. i don't have much time, so i'll try to make it quick." farkle really didn't want to do this, but he couldn't keep lying to her. "i like you." he paused. 

"i like you too. that's why we're together. what are you wanting to say?" she took his hand. 

"i- i don't know how to say this, isa. i'm- i... we need to break up." he was so nervous. 

"i don't... really understand. could you explain why you feel this way?"

"i just... i still like you, but not in the... uh, romantic way. i guess. i still like you as a friend, but if that'd be awkward i totally understand." farkle couldn't look her in the eye, he didn't know how she'd react.

"hone- farkle. it is totally okay. i'm glad you didn't lie to me and i'd still like to be friends." her ex-boyfriend sighed relieved. "what?" she smiled at him. "do you really think i would have said something negative? farkle, you are one of the best people i know." he smiled back at her. "thank you. gotta run, bye, see you!" now he just had to deal with his crush on dylan.


End file.
